Imagination and meditation

I decided to walk that misty and dark road i came across while i was walking along the woods in Nainital. In one look it seemed scary for i had heard of all those horror stories from my grandfather in my childhood. Nevertheless i decided to enter these terrifying mists and look into the other side.

I had walked not more than 200 meters that i witnessed a strange white light walking by my side. Trust me i would have screamed but to my surprise i felt a peculiar peace and joy in my heart. I was a bit scared or rather skeptical about it and was looking at it with my peripheral vision and see what exactly it was.

Suddenly it started throwing bulb shaped light in front of me with the great speed. I wondered if it were going to kidnap me but i was thrilled to see what followed next.

The whole scene was perfect heaven like and despite the heavy mists i could clearly see everything around me as there was so much light. There were beautiful waterfalls on one side of the road. I thought there was nothing on either side of the road but i was amazed to look at the awesome scenery. The giant waterfall was producing an enchanting  scent as its mighty blue waters fell down the cliff. I started to marvel at this beautiful scent. It captured my imagination and i started to feel very light in my heart and mind.

The white light figure asked me to keep walking. Yes! Now it was talking and its voice was sweeter than any lady’s and commanding than any general’s. I followed the way it showed and suddenly there were sounds of an instrument i had immense love for. It was a ‘Damroo”.

I started walking faster to reach the source of this heavenly music.

We reached at a very giant gate all covered with snow and roots of Banyan tree. I could hear the music clearly now making me desperate to see who was playing it. I asked the light figure to let me pass through this gate. I was not afraid of it anymore; i felt it was my friend and protector. He laughed and said very well!

I entered the gate and i noticed there was something different about the surroundings. The air i was breathing carried this music and started to play in my heart too. I could feel the vibrations in every cell.

The figure asked me if i would like to rest here. I was quick to ask him if there is more beautiful a place than this and he laughed again. Shiva is waiting was his response to my childlike attitude.

Hearing the name of Shiva  broke all the enchantments of this place and i realised where i was. I opened my eyes slowly feeling drugged with bliss.


I realised it was a deep meditation session and i just smiled and chanted ‘om namah shivaye’


Time is a very strange subject of thought and discussion. It has been so for time immemorial itself and probably will continue to do so.

Most of you will even skip talking about time and its flow saying that you don’t have time for it. Ironic it is, isn’t it?

Time, in my perspective, is a thread like energy structure entangled in a very complex way with other dimensions of our universe. Time originates with thought. As long as thought remains time will exist for you. That is why in spirituality there is so much stress over becoming thoughtless.

Achieving a Thoughtless state doesn’t mean you have become immortal. It merely bestows upon you the power to understand things without any bounds. Knowledge is infinite only if you can reach to that level of being free from threads of the time. Thoughtlessness saves you from the worries of past,present and future and thus making you capable of exploring what lies beyond time.

Time is an illusion is what most yogis and philosophers quote. Well, i won’t completely agree with it because it becomes illusion in a metaphorical sense once you have fairly grasped it nature and flow. Time is a very real dimension of our existence and guards the amount of knowledge that can pass through it into our consciousness. That is why knowledge is often portrayed dependent upon experience whereas there are many whose knowledge and intelligence surpass their chronological ages.


So much for time now. It takes time to think and even more to write.

Isn’t it? ;-)


How to get a 5-minute job done in 2 hours?

10:30 am.
Deserted room. Dusty tables. Wires running all over the place as if hijacked by thin black snakes, like in that movie ” Snakes in the Plane”. A lady, wearing hand-woven cream coloured sweater and bright, and I mean slide the photo-editor-slider-to-extreme-right-level of bright red shawl, just entered. The scarcely populated hall nods a little, tells me she must be a senior in ranks here. 15 desktop pc’s, and only 4 have been booted up. 1 out of these 4 machines have Flipkart, Amazon and SnapDeal opened up. All tabs with different brands of wrist watches opened up. Thin straps. Colours red, pink and all shades of these two colours. I guess the surd guy’s daughter’s birthday is coming up. The discussion is about where to find the express delivery option. Forgot to buy a gift, and now looking for a way out, this guy.
E-com has changed the entire structure of shopping and gifting in India within the last few years. An age when shopping online had hesitance to an age when shopping from a local mart raises more hesitation. Blame the easy, zero argument, return of goods facility these sites provide.

10:50 am. 5th pc boots up. But attendance in the room hasn’t changed. An attitude that reflects the attitude of all Govt. Departments. Morning gossip is an essential start of the day. The old machine apparently takes some more time, time worth some last night alcohol party gossip sharing, to rise up to the Green Meadow wallpaper of Windows XP. The red shawled woman calls out to the lady who has been swirling the spoon in a large mug for the last 15 mins. What we call, “beating the coffee”, for a creamier coffee. So this red woman hands over a bunch of papers to her. She walks straight to the worn out photocopier cum scanner. God! This copier needs to be admitted to the ICU ward of Hewlett Packard service station urgently. Such loud screeches.

11 am. Still no sign of any increase in the attendance of the room. Punjabi songs are flowing through the air molecules around; sharing of songs is underway now. The guy I am supposed to meet is nowhere to be seen.

government offices in India

The scarcely populated Government Offices!

Steel racks being used to the best. Heavy Index files all around, with wide plain sheets pasted on their spines, marking what the file is all about.
Meanwhile, coffee is ready. The butter bite biscuits are being garnished on flat, embossed with flowery designs, steel dishes.

“No thanks.”, I promptly reply, to the lifting of eyebrows by the helping staff, presuming I was being offered a cup!

11:30 am. So the guy arrives finally. Heavy corduroy coat. French beard. Santa belly.

11:35 am. Documents signed. Letters picked up. I am on my way back. So all I needed to do was a 1 and a half hour travel, over one hour of patience for a 5-minute job. Day well wasted.

The one where I am the Batman.

So finally sanity has bid adieu to me.
Woke up today from a bizzare dream.
Dream where I am Batman. Kung-fu-ing the shit outta Joker with iron rods. I know what the usual belief is: “you dream whatever is your recent memory or something that you saw, maybe on TV.”
But then I don’t remember driving the bat-mobile off late. Oh and yes. Haven’t watched any Bat-flick either.
Boy did I have some crazy kick-ass moves. Heath Ledger had definitely hadn’t expected such a thrashing. Also, I guess it’s the bat suit that suddenly makes your voice hoarse. Because normally, I have a very weird embarrasing voice. But the moment I had the black cape on with the male hijaab and two pointy ears, the hoarse voice. Kaboom.

So that’s that then. Superhero dream. I definitely need some coffee, and some sleep (coffee and sleep in the same sentence. Now that cant be good, can it?).

Signing off.
Gotham needs its bat.

On and On

She went on & on about her troubles.
He kept looking into her eyes, listening to her melody, solving his own troubles…

Swollen nose, eyes red, voice furious,
While he listened to it all. How is she so beautiful, he was curious….

She went on and on about some jerk,
He wrote stories of her, about her, with her. About how things would work…

When I’ll be gone…

Don’t try to wake me up, when I am gone.
Don’t try to shake me up, on the last of my dawn.

I would have passed through the tunnel of light,
Don’t call me back, beating my chest with your might.

I was here for a reason & don’t know if I succeeded,
But I tried. Tried my best. Put in everything it needed.

On the last dusk of my era, just be around,
Don’t hide away in tears. I would need your aura to surround.

I might not have earned a name. Nor might have any fame.
But one thing I did best was to love you. It was true. Not a game.

In those last 60 minutes, tell me who I was, what I meant,
Speak of our good times. The shooting stars, the camps and the tent.

When my final hour arrives, kiss me for it would be the last one,
But don’t say goodbye. I will be gone to another realm. To do the undone.

On my final seconds, now, I might look scared and in pain,
It is the fear of the unknown and grief. Pray not in disdain.

As I depart now, I am old now. I am cold now. Carry me to my grave in our lawn.
Don’t put a tombstone. Setup a milestone that reads In Love Forever. Even when he is gone…

Grow your wings again!

Grow your wings again, oh cruel heart,
For it was not my fault that he broke you.

Grow you wings again, my dear heart,
For I was abused by a heart not red but blue.

Grow you wings ’cause I need you to my stubborn heart,
I trusted him with you. He, all my secrets who knew.

Grow you wings again, we are safe now,
For he is long gone and its time we flew.

Grow your wings my heart, oh please,
We found a traveller new.
Traveller to travel with to mountains and rivers and lush green grass topped with the morning dew…grow your wings again. For the journey just began.

For far too long…

You are a storm. A strong one. One which can take things away.
But I have been a boulder for far too long. Lift me as you come.

You are a change. Change that can move realms and planets.
But I have been cold. Winter. For far too long. Make me summer.

Your voice is soft. Soft like a pillow to a wanderer who hasnt slept.
And I am a thorn. Rough and in agony for far too long. Help me sleep.

You are north. I am south. You are east. I am west.
You are complete and I have been empty, for far too long.

You are water, I am ice. You are doplets, I am smoke.
You are the puzzle that I have been fixated on for far too long.

This is day number 108 since I gave you my heart. Since it stopped beating. But it already feels like it belongs to you now. Like it’s been yours for far too long.

So much more…

I was color blind,
But with her I saw clarity, so much more.

I lacked what they called laughter,
But our jokes cracked me up, so much more.

Life usually seems so waste,
But there is always more to it, so much more.

I realized so many dreams,
And still had dreams so many more.

Letters stopped coming. Seasons changed.
But I had ink bottle still half full. For I had to write so much more.